gengki the newbie

*** gengki the newbie ***

Friday, 28 October 2005

la vakasyon

i have this sugat in my mouth that looks like i've been whacked. although andaming taong nagtanong kung ano ba nangyarai sa bibig ko. di ko nga rin alam eh. nagising ako na parang may 3 rashes na naka-helera sa bibg ko tapos konting kamot and paggising mo ayun mukhang inatake ng sampung ipis yung bibig ko. ang panget niya. mukha siyang night of the living dead na prosthetics. o di ba very timely ang halloween get-up ko. kainis. but of course when asked i just told the viewing public na natamaan ng aparador sakto sa bibig kaya ganyan ang sugat.. hindi kaya inatake nga ng ipis ito? yay..

i have no idea kung ano ba ang Fontana. tunog-Casino pero hindi so i asked zara about it at swimming place lang pala siya. susme. akala ko naman kung ano.. ayun... i started packing my bags to the angst-ridden tune of SHeryl Crow's You're my Favorite Mistake... pack lightly dapat... ok naman.. isang backpack at isang bag lang... will tell you all about it..

last night, i watched 2 dramas from 2 networks.. streaming in pain and restraint ang angst ko... siyempre i didn't cry because nakaka-iyak yung artista.. i watched it and applied it to myself and how i would play it on stage... stellar... ang sakit... automatic faucet na naman ito... hay nakaka-miss umarte talaga...

speaking of arte.. i had a friend from PETA who died of Lupus.. ano ba yang lupus na yan? shock ako.. kasi noon magkasama lang kaming kumakain ng palabok tapos tinutulungan ko pa yung anak niya makapasok sa ABS tapos malaman laman mo na lang dedz na...

at alam mo ba kung ano ang nakalagay sa lapida niya... GAmay Dacanay... ina, guro at artista ng bayan... ano ba naman ang ikakabog mo doon? ako kaya kapag kinuha nako ni Lord? sana ganyan din kaganda ang epitaph ko...

posted by gengcooker at 05:09 | link | comments

Saturday, 22 October 2005

what?

ok. hindi ko maintindihan pero iba ang energy level ko ngayong araw na ito. hindi mataas. hindi rin mababa. feeling ko kelangan kong pumasok sa isang anger management therapy. naiirita ako sa mg maliit na bagay at hindi ko alam kung bakit. Kanina sa MRT. nakalugay ang buhok ko, paglabas ko ang daming babaeng mahaba ang buhok at nakalugay din kaya pinusod ko na lang ang buhok ko para maiba naman. at medyo nainis ako sa idea na bakit ang daming mahabang buhok na babae dito sa Pilipinas. at isa na ako dun? di siyempre nainis ako sa buhok ko.

Tapos pag pasok ko sa POwerbooks, tumitingin ako ng libro may mga taong binabangga ang bag ko so lipat ako dun sa hindi mataong part ng powerbooks, ayun may nagtakbuhang mga bagets sa harap ko. napundi talaga ang utak ko at parang gusto ko dalhin sa DSWD tong mga lintek nato. And then na-realize ko di naman ako madalas ganito... dati nga nasisiko pa ko sa pimple ko di naman ako nagrereklamo. speaking of pimple, isa pa yan sa mga kinaiinisan ko, may 4 na pimple akong nag-blemish around my mouth area na mukhang moo-moo o kanin na nangitim at isa na mukha pang kulangot na natuyo.

syempre napatingin ako sa malalaking salaming naka-balandra sa Yoshinoya at habang kumakain ng pira-pirasong beef, nakikita mo ang sarili mo na ang panget panget. naapektuhan na naman ang mood ko. hindi ito dapat, may i-interviewhin pa naman ako mamya baka lalo lang akong mabanas

so, ang ginawa ko pumunta ako sa gen. psychology section ng powerbooks. kinuha ko yung librong "how to be happy, dammit' may dammit pang kasama sa title. ayun binasa ng konti. medyo na engganyo. inayos ko ang buhok ko sa magandang pusod at nilagyan ng diamond na barrettes at dumiretso sa internet shop para ilabas ang lahat ng nararamdaman ko sa blog ko.

medyo ok na.

posted by gengcooker at 04:12 | link | comments

Tuesday, 11 October 2005

NO HAINE MOI

Ok. Little has been said about me because i know that it lingers on someone's mind with what can someone say about me. It's ok. We're like an opinion page full of opinions--- and what else. But i know what one is thinking. I know one and i see one when somebody does not like me.

It's ok. It's very humane not to like someone. I, particularly, do not like everybody but it's just that. Not liking is just 2 words, to others it is an action. A claim to revolution and an impetus of change. Pwede ba.. Tigilan mo nga ako. kung di kita feel baka siguro sa next lifetime feel na kita. and you are reserved of respect merely by existence. I have to explain this though about myself.

1. I have not so many friends but they are very very good friends.

2. I am not a social butterfly--- at first. But i become a social butter when i want to.

3. I do not talk to people i don't like but i have to admit i am prejudiced and that leaves me a window for digging deeper.

4. I hate it when people are so overly late and i am waiting in a not so convenient fashion.

5. i am sometimes shy but unexpectedly loud

6. i am not moved by people who shout at my face just because of one wrong thing

7. i talk like a gay person sometimes.

8. i just shut up on days when i like to just shut up

9. if you think i am angry well, i am not. it's just my voice

10. i secretly like compliments from my good good friends

11. i can intimidate anyone. haha! with just my voice...

posted by gengcooker at 13:43 | link | comments (5)

Friday, 07 October 2005

new envelopes and new discoveries

its put into productive use-- my day i'm speaking of. something is happening and i so so love it. there is drama, trauma, walking in the rain and birthdays and moving fences. I stress moving fences honey... yes it is and it is just beginning. i cannot really disclose what happened due to professional reasons. in a month siguro.

i dropped a semi-atomic bomb that doesn't crack but sent eyebrows in a galaxial state in my workpit. uhuh.. it is not a daily task to drop something but when you do drop something make sure that it is worth dropping like a Nora Aunor acting without really flexing one whit of muscle. haha. suffice it to say-- i savored it like a sabaw ng bulalo. and i have never become so fulfilled. as if my tresses were just newly conditioned by pantene smooth and silky

tomorrow will be a birthday celebration of a dear college/blogger/dancer friend of mine.hmmm... smells like rant and college spirit once again.. and a lot of food and catching up and high hopes and restlessness and laitan mode in its mature level... syempre mga working people na ang mga bakla..

first time i walked while raining and i didn't get so grumpy...that is so weird...it really gets on my nerves that walking on the rain before... pero somehow i walked the other side of greenbelt with all my fluttering fiesta palda and green tsinelas with matching tampisaw ng tubig ulan sa legs ko. maybe it's a sign of maturity or a sigh of patience or probably a sign of tranquility... or maybe wala lang... di lang ako bad trip nun... pwede rin.

i went to gloria diaz's house 2 days ago and i saw a very big 16x20 size of her picture circa 70's as in nung pinakamagandang hayop sa balat ng lupa days pa niya. and she is fuckingly hot. appeal was in the house. it can give a stagnant hormone to rage once again. and she was strikingly morenang ilocana... naalala ko tuloy ang moodrahbel ko...

while me and paulie were waiting for a cab outside 6750 in ayala, we eavesdropped on a bar with a band and it played the ever popular 'Through the Fire" I think this song which was buried long ago and thus revived by Nina became the yardstick for a singers' voice pitch nowadays. Well, we heard a the version of Mae Bayot. As in the Bayot sisters that include Lani Misalucha which i think is a better singer than regine. Sori mga baklang fans ni regine, opinyon ko yan ha.

Hers was soulful and deep. Poppish- Operatic version. Parang bigla na lang lalabas ang ensemble ng Himala sa likod niya at kakanta ng Elsaaaaaahhh. She didn't really belt out in the part "... for a chance to be with you/ i'd take it aaaalll the waaaay... " Yung parang sinundot ka sa keps mo at bigla kang napa-AAAALLLL the way. This was more polished, loungey with a touch of that trademark Bayot surname. I like it better than that of Nina. Alam mong kaya niya gawin yun but she'd rather not kasi she's not Nina.

Anyway, had a good good day. So much to offer and less to say. More to prove with what you have been armed for all your 23 years of breathing. I think we're on a new direction. Thank God. This must be redemption from the grave and it feels fucking good. Kulang na lang manood ako ng good movie and sakto na.

posted by gengcooker at 16:55 | link | comments

This has been my sanctuary for four years already. It's my extension. Almost like a limb out in the open. Know that people want to express, to just chuck it out, to just be themselves even on something as artificial as blog. I am that people. So don't mind me...