THE DFA ULTIMATE EXPERIENCE

September 15, 1980.

Yan ang putanginang date kung kelan kinasal ang mga magulang ko. At dahil diyan sa putanginang date na yan inis-nab ako ng taga-DFA at sabi bumalik na lang ako.

My gosh. I cannot believe. Me. A true blue Filipino citizen with matching morena skin and gabriela silang traits would be flabbergasted and scrutinized by my fellow countryman in the Department of Foreign affairs. I cannot take that in my own land from which i refuse to leave despite and amidst the exodus of every talented Filipino would tell me to go back and redo the whole process of  passport application. I cannot take it that i am a suspected candidate for falsification of identity in my own fucking country from which i believe will be once great again.

" Hija, marami kasing nagpapalit ng pangalan ngayon, pwede ka namang bumalik anytime.. hindi mo lang nasagutan kung kelan kinasal ang parents mo."

I went to the DFA today donning my very lacey and cute cardigan. I had to travel from Quezon City to Pasay. I took an FX from QC to Manila and i had to take a cab from there since i don't know where the hell is the DFA. I rode in a taxi and asked me if i was going to Japan. No. The driver thought about that because every passenger he took in that was going to the DFA was applying for a job in Japan. Haha! Manong ibahin mo ako. The last time i danced that would vie for a job in Japan was on my 4th grade. Thank you.

The driver even told me that when i had my visa approved to France, i should never go back to Manila. I said i had a job here and no can do. I'm going there for leisure. Wow.. leisure ha... And he said that it wasn't a good decision to do that because its not easy getting a european visa approved. I know. I know. But then again manong, ibahin mo ako. I have always believed we have choices. If the driver thinks that i am rotting my life here so be it but my option is not to think that my life rots in staying and working here. Anyway, that was a very fine exchange between hoi pollois of Philippine society.

Oh, but to give credit. The preliminary DFA people are very accomodating. Checking every documents. Telling the correct ID picture. Xeroxing certificates. Handing out glue and ballpens. Making sure that when you line up you will be complete. It was again a breeze after the first tataks and panels of DFA people with laptops. Then i went inside GAte 2.

And the CSI Pasay starts...

Anong middle name ng nanay mo? Me: Ibe po.

 Sinong mas matanda sa nanay at tatay mo?  Me: Sir, Bakit nyo po tinatanong?

Sagutin mo lang yung tanong ko ok? Ako lang ang magtatanong, wag mo ako tanungin. Malinaw ba yun?  Me:Ok

Taga-saan ang nanay mo? Me: Ilocos.

Ilan kayo magkakapatid? Me: Apat

Kelan kinasal ang nanay mo? Me: September...

Then he starts to gather all my papers. Sees my photocopied company ID. He looks curious that i work for the current number one channel. Asks for my ID and checks on it. He asked me that i should also get an NBI clearance to add support. And then asked me to come back because i didn't know the date of my Mom and Dad's marriage. Just like that. As if i was on the prowl to get out of the country. As if i had plans to humiliate my country. As if  i was going to spit my bubblegum in the streets of Singapore.

Ok. Probably it was his job to do that. Probably he got a wooden picture frame as his present from his monito-monita after buying a Punch bowl with cups. Probably he didn't like my lacey outfit. Probably he wanted to pee.

So i stormed out the building. Feigning complacency. Feeling my carcass rumble with fury. Folding all my papers in my bag. Cheekbones numbing. Gnashing my teeth as i feel the earth move in my bag to search for my cellphone. I texted my Tita how can i get an NBI clearance.

 Next time, I have to study. It's like going to a test unprepared. And since i didn't know that it was going to be like that, i charge it to my ignorance and experience.

Paulie said that it was in preparation for me to the VISA interview.